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I was always the first to message friends. When I stopped I lost my entire circle. Am I a crap person?

Posted on April 23, 2026
By The Guardian
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1 min read

I was always the first to message friends. When I stopped I lost my entire circle. Am I a crap person?

You can’t infer people never liked you because they haven’t reached out, writes advice columnist Eleanor Gordon-Smith. The question is whether you can tolerate this asymmetry